War on Pants
From Gruntipedia
The War on Pants was the bloodiest war ever to recorded by the Grunts. Its main aggressors were Kwarsh and Espock.
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[edit] How it started
Soon after the Human-Covie war ended, all the Grunts had heard about the Gruntiness, a chemical that made them flip-out and kill people Grunts.
With the Grunt homeworld smelling more like farts than usual, the biggest asshole on Balaho, named "Espock" decided that all Grunts should wear pants because he didn't like the smell. Using the power of persuasion, all the Grunts wore pants, all of them except Kwarsh.
Kwarsh, being Grunty lord, retaliated by not wearing pants on national Gruntivision. Espock was outraged, and sent out his vigilante army of Trained Super-Men to stop Kwarsh, who had used the Gruntiness, giving him UNIMAGINABLE POWERS.
Finally, after Espock's army was disposed, Kwarsh had run out of Gruntiness, and was now recruiting his fellow Grunts to help him stop the killjoy known as Espock.
By this time, however, Espock had developed a form of Super-men that could be powered by the few bits of Gruntiness left, and used his new Atomic Monsters to massacre the Kwarsh "Freedom Army".
Kwarsh declared war.
[edit] The War
The War itself lasted 6 months, and had like, 7 battles.
[edit] The battle for Cheese Town
The first in many Pants War battles, where Kwarsh first flipped out and killed everyone. After he killed everyone, he ripped the pants off all the Grunts he killed, and burned them in a bonfire.
[edit] The battle of interpretive dance
Hundreds of Thousands of brave Grunts risked their lives fighting Atomic Super-Men in the battle for lord of the Dance. Espock is declared winner, although Kwarsh has a bad case of denial and always threatens to comit suicide whenever any one mentions the battle.
[edit] Battle of the bands
It was Grunts vs. Aids in the rocking battle. Hundreds died because of the enemy's kicking riffs, and Kwarsh's band, "The Nips", won with flying colours, some say. Others were taken to psychiatric help after telling the authorities that they saw flying colours.
[edit] The Great boat Race
In this epic conflict, The Atomic Aids men used their witty teamwork to win the Great Boat race after Kwarsh's "Freedom Army" got tired and went to sleep and dreamt about the Armbiter pwnng them all.
[edit] The Final showdown
While not really the final showdown, the Grunts consider it as such because all but 147 of them died in this *epic battle of epic proportions.
*epicness not guaranteed
[edit] Tickle fight
Look, this basically explains it all. Everyone died, except Espock and Kwarsh.
[edit] Halo showdown
They played Halo CE, a Sticky fight. Kwarsh emerged victorious with 25 - 24. Kwarsh wins the war.
[edit] Aftermath
Interbreeding.
