UNSC Marine Corps

From Gruntipedia

This article is too damned short, Marine! You will help Gruntipedia by making it larger so it will fit the screen, fool!

One marine is not worth killing, but sticking one marine is.

— sergeant Pete Stacker

the plasma nade tastes finger licking Good AAHHH.

— Colonel Sanders after getting stuck licking it and then blowing up

the Gruntiness tastes finger licking Good AAHHH.

— Colonel Sanders after licking gruntiness and then realising it really just grunt gizz

One noob is worth a thousand marines.

— Someone

Whoopeee!!!!

— Marine after smacking you with the end of a Warthog

Aw, crap... you guys suck!

— Marine on friendly fire.

Nobody asked if we had a driving license when recruiting...

— Anonymous marine after a crash with Scorpion

GHOST RIDE DA WHIP!!!

— Marine after joyriding through New Mombasa

...Oops?

— Marine after misfiring a rocket launcher into a wall and blowing up Master Thief and the marines around him.

SHUKI!!! SHUKI!!! SHUKI!!!.

— Pvt. Andres Carrizo avoiding sniper fire.

Sorry!!!

— Marine after running over the Master Chief

Hold my beer and watch this

— Marine war cry.

He was my lover!

— A marine b*tching at the chief for killing his friend, and then shooting at him.

My name is tony.

— A marine all alone except for the 500 elites also in the room.

Under no (set) Circumstances (are we a) Marine Corps is an elite fighting force tasked with being awful drivers and cannon fodder for the Master Chief. In turn, they're really good at crashing into walls, missing anything smaller than an Elephant, and getting shot.

You know, for an "elite" military force, these guys are pretty dimwitted. They like to bring out one liners and curses, but unlike real Marines, they don't use real curses, just the ones you would expect to see in a PG-13 action movie. They're like "yippie-kay-eh" without the "motherfucker". It has been well known that marines suck and are worth killing on a level with flood as all they do is make you job harder when they get AIDS. Almost all marines will wait for the Chief to come until they start fighting, and it seems as though they think of Master Chief as some fully armored Jesus.

In addition, you can give them weapons, like the Rocket Launcher. However this is rarely advised, as they like just looove friendly fire. Oddly enough, to perhaps counterbalance their lack of brains, they have infinite ammo. So, for whatever reason, if you give them a Rocket Launcher with one round left, they magically have one hundred thousand rounds on hand, all waiting for the real enemy, the rest of their squad. If you give them a weak weapon, like the pistol, however, all they do is bitch and moan about it until the end of time.

The current theory is that all Marines are inbred, or clones of one another, as there seems to be at least two Australian Marines in one level, and four Stackers in another and the same two female Marines no matter what, even if they die. It is also known that there are only four marines but they all have different voices.

Marines may be incompetent when fight along side you. But if you kill too many of your own men 10,000 guys pop out of nowhere with SMGs and shoot the brains out of you and it hurts like a B****.I wonder why they're better at killing you than killing Covenant...

It is said that 100 skilled Marines could take out 5 Brutes and a pickle, with only 50 casualties. Also, many marines have been known to be completely obliterated by Hunters, such as Igido Nosa Hurru. In this case, the marines were blown to pieces and stepped on by his inter breeding man/wife Ogada Nosa Fasu, leaving the Chief to attack them himself.

As seen in the picture to the right the marine is trying to do a headspin while the master chief eggs him on.Sardgent avery johnson was a spartan 1 and also swears at marines and landed a smart insult on 343 gultiy spark then the spark shot him and then gave him a wedgie

the Ugly Noobish Space Cow Marine cockheads were created by General Resputia Girlietitz to Fight the covenant "uglies" But they F***ing Suck Mother F***ing BaLlZ at their F***ing job and can only kill jackholes and shout F***ing annoying one liners Because they having no F***ing Training. Recently the MotherF***ing unsc began F***ing cuting marines nads off because no one wants F***ing oneliner shouting COCKHEADS having F***ing babys also on a lighter note marines have infinite ammo for any weapon becuase the Annoying bas****s couldnt hit the F***ing Bright side of a Mother F***ing BARN!!!!

[edit] Other Stuff

Everyone needs to eat right, even Marines. So the UNSC has given every marine an MRE. Meals Ready to Eat. Although Marines hate this shit and would rather die than be forced to eat, they almost always kill themselves first.

Since the MRE's contain a sexy picture of Cortana lap dancing, this has given alot of Marines moral boosts helping survive some assaults.