Cquote1Not your ordinary UNSC Noob Corps NoobCquote2
— A Marine
Cquote1I fear no man...but that scares me.Cquote2
— The Heavy talking about Sarah Palmer
Cquote1Wort Wort Wo-OH SH--*BOOMCquote2
— An elite 'sploded by Sarah Palmer

s Commander Sarah Palmer, also called Boss Ass Bitch Bitch Bitch, The Sexiest Bitch Who Ever Lived, and That Annoying Chick is a descendent of Hercules , and the official Commander of the Big Ass ship . She likes to yell at her subordinates, and be a bitch.

She is the one of the most badass Spartans ever: She once killed 7 apes within 10 seconds with her bare fists. She is second to Master Chief in terms of badassery in humans, that's why she likes him so much. Because she is so badass

and sexy, she thinks she's better than everyone else, especially those asshats in Crimson Team.

As mentioned before, she is incredibly sexy. She is about 5 billion times sexier than that Russian slut and about 17 trillion times more badass. Literally everyone on the Infinity gets the most massive hardens of their lives when she walks by.

Still, despite her badassery and sexiness, she is the BIGGEST FUCKING BITCH EVER. She gets mad really easily and slaps and/or beats the living shit out of everyone who calls her "a sexy piece of ass" or a "blowjob machine" or a "slut". What's her deal? Anyways, she hates people that don't get the job right, and by job I mean pointless mission that has absolutely nothing to do with the story. Her favorite punching bags are Lasky and Crimson Team, who she beats every day.  

Basically, you don't want to fuck with Sarah Palmer. Actually, you do. What I mean is, you don't want to mess with her. Actually, maybe you do. What I mean is, you don't want to get on her bad side. She can be cocky in a bitchy way, but she's still pretty fucking Hot.

Since a young age, she had a very prominent distaste for eggheads. She beat them up, took their lunch money, blackmailed them, sent them mean messages on facebook, and founded the Anti-Egghead society. So, if you're an egghead, you'd better run before Sarah finds you and tells you things that are not nice.

Her inspiration to be a UNSC officer and being a UNSC's Whore

In her age of 15,UNSC recruited her to join the spartan program. she practiced fighting, the use of guns, and Mix martial arts.

After 10 years of training, They are certified spartan soldiers now. they celebrate themselves. while sarah palmer is drinking and eating in her alone dorm, the men invites her to join the party in their dorm. they continue the party. hours later, the men are bored and wanted to do something else. a man shouted that "i have a idea!" the whole men standed and woke up. the man said "come here boys". the boys whispering about to fuck sarah palmer. the 1000 men agreed.

When sarah palmer wakes up, she saw that she is alone. she grabbed her clothes and wear it again and gets out in the men's dorm. when she opened the door, she saw the head of UNSC standing next to her. The head said "come to my office. let's talk." sarah said "yes sir." and closed the door. Sarah always think that she has never any have bad reports to her. Sarah comes to the head's office and talks. The head is taking about the massive gangbang last night. Sarah deeply apologize. the head said "i don't need your apologize." Sarah said " Thank you sir! i thought im gonna get fired" the head said "not only that, im gonna promote you and gonna put you to Infinity." sarah smiled. and the sex happened.

Spartan gangbang


People Shes Beaten Up Edit

  • Fillma hooters
  • Notest icle
  • Eggheaded Bastards
  • All of your friends
  • Your mother Your best friend during spring break
  • People......
  • black americans
  • your daddy
  • Sarah palmer's another identity
  • n00bs
  • Lasky (For writing that shitty Fanfiction)


  • before became a officer,she is a hooker at the club in las vegas.
  • Gangbanged by the flood for a year... seriously
  • fucks the whole UNSC officers and troops
  • Fucked locke
  • Deal with the prophet,meaning they have sex for 2 weeks,for destroying the halo

More information:

  • she prefers nude while wearing an armor
  • she prefers to striptease
  • favorite weapon:salt riffle and battle spaghetti
  • Dream boy:Masterchief
  • Favorite youtuber:SSSniperwolf