SMG
From Gruntipedia
| This article is too damned short, Marine! You will help Gruntipedia by making it larger so it will fit the screen, fool!
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I shot a whole clip point blank on my belly to commit suiside but instead it hit my cat Jonesy 500 miles away!!
- — PFC Wallace A. Jenkins after watching the love scene between Avery Johnson and Jilan al-Cygni.
- All I had was a FUCKING GAY ASS SMG, I shot it, nothing was hit THATS HOW GOD DAMN FUCKING GAY IT IS!
- — Master Chief tells a story
- SMG-$hi7tin' Mechanizem uva Gun. That's icsactly what it should be called!!
- — The only smart UNSC Marine in a 1,000,000 mile radius(other than Master Chief that is)
- If you like this gun you are the world's biggest N@@B ever! But I still like it.
- — The world's biggest N@@B ever.
- Hey! I like this gun, I don't get why all u gruntpedians always make fun of it!
- — Miranda Keys(notice how she always uses this
shitgun in halo 2)
- Oh It's a shrunken assault rifle!
- — A halo noob that is about to turn into a halo 2 noob
The SMG (also known as Shitty Machine Gun or Shitty Mini Gun) is a UNSC weapon that in Halo 2 had almost no effect on enemies whatsoever, besides scaring them with a sound like an automatic stapler. In Halo 3 it's just as shitty, but the Assault Rifle sound like a stapler instead. These weapons will piss you off in about... the second you fire them. While it fired fast and had an enormous clip, the SMG failed to hit anything, and whether any casualties were ever sustained from this is currently unknown. All it was good for was making alot of flashing and noise. It was pretty much one big firework. When the Assault Rifle was taken out of the game from being too awesome and balanced, The SMG was supposed to replace it. It made a more effective "bullet hose", if you expand the definition of "bullet" to "pieces of shrapnel and shit", and are a dual-weildable pile of fail and ass. A Spartan might use an SMG because it makes them look even cooler and badass holding 2 weapons or if there's no other gun around. However, the Spartan might as well just throw their helmet at the foe.
The SMG is possibly the greatest gyp ever devised. A handheld machine gun that you can hold with one hand (Ie: you can hold two), and it never hits ANYTHING!
This weapon makes noobs cry for their aimbots as soon as they see the 5 inch piece of plastic. the side effects of holding an SMG include a sprained wrist.
[edit] Side Effects
Using the SMG can induce the following deadly medical conditions: n00biness, AIDS, and being nominated to be a Halopedia Admin.
[edit] How to use
Shoot at everything but the thing you're aiming at and you will kill everyone. However, you must be in a cramped room, with all you enemies boxing you in, and you must have aimbot turned on. And it will still take 4 clips to take anyone's shields down. However, if you use it with the n00b combo, you might acctually get a kill if you're playing on easy. And have 3+ clips to waste. It has also known to have the smell of cheese and emit a radiation called fatty smell. If taunted the smg will spray its protective 1337 juice. it was removed from game because it would explode the earth if used.
Or, you could always use 2 and just look badass. It doesn't have much range, there is more kick while firing, and you can't use grenades, but, you do look badass.
