For those born without a sense of humour, Halopedia has an article on Offensive Bias.

We all remember Mendicant Bias as being a traitorous asshole in the before Halo times. But how did the Forerunners try to stop him? Another lightbulb named Offensive Bias was created to pwn Mendicant. Offensive Bias got his name because he spent his nameless early years being an offensive racist. His many stereotypes earned him the position of Dishonorable Admiral for the Forerunners. As an Admiral, Offensive was assigned to find and hang Mendicant for betraying God. Yes MC was around at this time, he's a God of War. Offensive got some God Ships and went on the hunt.

Offensive vs. Mendicant (death of a brotherhood)Edit

Offensive searched the known Universe, which was at the time just the Forerunner homeworld and some other dumpster planets. Offensive could not believe how tough it was to find Mendicant's fat ass fleet of AIDS ships. This was very bad. Every day Offensive didn't find Mendicant, his salary was reduced. To help get his mind off things Offensive sent many racist and sexual text messages to Forerunners under a false name: Gene Simmons. He didn't know that his phone had caller ID active so the Forerunners sent a virus to him that gave him the feeling of being smacked across the face and then being raped. Finally after what felt like an entire week of school, Offensive found Mendicant's fleet. Offensive was pwnt. This was gonna happen anyway.

Final ActEdit

Seeing he was doomed, Offensive sent his virus to Mendicant just before dying in a pile of his own filth. Offensive's dead robot self fell to the surface of Earth where he exploded with a nuclear blast. He had landed in Mexico and blew up the Dinosaurs. It was no meteor you dumbass scientists. It was an alien lightbulb that blew up after getting pwnt by another jackass lightbulb. That makes more sense. The only part of Offensive that still exists is his virus that continues to torture Mendicant to this day with feelings of physical abuse and rape.

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