- Pay attention and stop stabbing the Elites! Oh, what the hell, Grunty Grunts will be Grunty, I guess.
- — Professor Rtas 'Vadumee on the Grunts' behavior
- You killed Flipyap! Or Yapflip was he? It was Yapflip. No, Flipyap was his brother! Don't tell me I don't know Flipyap! Flip and I went to Nipple Accademy together! And now he's dead!
- — Grunt on a dying friend
The Retard Convention was the school for educating disabled Humans. But, the Forerunners messed up and created an academy for salamanders, which are close to Humans, but they like jackhammers more. The Forerunners, being
the cowards they are, blew up the place. Ebola infested the place, but died as soon as they entered because of the presence of the most powerful race of Covenant, the Grunts. Thanks to their Gruntiness, they killed all the AIDS. The Grunts renamed the school to "The Nipple Academy" then went to have tea in London and decided that the Nipple Academy would be a good place to beat up Brutes. So, they forced Brutes to go there and they sent their kids to the Heretic pit. The Grunts beat the living hell out of the Brutes, and are revered as the Gods of Gruntiness. The Nipple Academy is now more commonly known as Middle School, and it is the main center of learning how to be a Deacon for Grunts. Elites can learn to be Grunts without having a species switch. John-117 declared the place the international center of l337ness as well.
Notable Members Edit
- Grunt #1
- Grunt #2
- Grunt #3
- Grunt #4
- Grunt #5
- Grunt #6
- Grunt #7
- Grunt #8
- Grunt #9
- Grunt #10
- Grunt #11
- Grunt #12
- Grunt #13
- Grunt #14
- Grunt #15
- Grunt #16
- Grunt #17
- Grunt #18
- Grunt #19
- The Cowardly Grunt
- The Final Grunt
- Flipyap or Yapflip, whatever the hell his name is.
- That grunt that hates pickles.
- ADMYAMAMOTO II-even though he was an Imperial Admiral Elite.
- Grunt Ultra 9
- Otha' Letham
- Professor Dickface McChunchy (He was a teacher)
- Menace Potatoe (he was an honors student, who graduated and got gruntiness)
The Nipple Academy has many classes, these include:
- Food Nipple 101: making disgusting shit into good stuff.
- An Hero 101: How to blow yourself up with the most success.
- History 101: Learn why grunts are better than everyone else.
- Driving 101: How to properly operate the ghost (One percent of grunts pass this class).
- Boomsticks 101: Learn about weapons (But it doesn't help).
- Battle Tactics 101: Running away from every situation.
- Economics 101: How to run a jerk store.
- Home Economics 101: How to conserve Master Chiefs so you don't have to spend more money at the jerk store.
Sport Programs Edit
The Nipple Academy has many sports, these include:
- Shooting practice (most fail).
- The grunt version of football: Bruteball. It's actually sort of entertaining -- if you like seeing Grunts tossing a meat ball around. The team is called: The Grunts who Pinched back.
- Cannoning, it's pointless sorta like that
Jackal movieJackass movie. They just shoot themselves out of giant cannons making strange squealing noises.
- The Suicide Grunt's 100 meter dash. (No grunt lives, all elites laugh)
Ejumacation Standards Edit
They're low and this explains a grunt's stupidity and lack of logic on and off the battle field. They are pretty much only taught the art of running, screaming , and handling huge-ass weapons.