For those born without a sense of humour, Halopedia has an article on armor Mjolnir armor.
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Mjolnir armorEdit

Is super special armor which gives the wearer a feeling of badassness. It is only wearable by Spartans because if anyone else tries to wear it, it will cause their genitals to shrink to epicly small proportions and all of their arms to break off. They did have some problems at first though because most Spartans didn't want to wear it. The UNSC got around this by putting big designer labels on all the armor.

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The purpose of this armor was to protect the user from sniper turkeys and Brutes. It has slowly got worse over the years. The Mark V armor has an awesome shield which can be used to beat up Grunts and Elites. It also lets you step on popcorn. The Mark VI armor had a sucky shield but, it lets you do the n00b combo. The armor may seem awesome but, it can get gummed up by silly string which will cause it to explode. The best feature of the armor is that it will protect the wearer from AIDS.

Armor permutationsEdit

These permutations are only on Multiplayer so this means you can't flame grill a grunt with your helmet. Here is a list of armor permutations:

Mark VI: Is the classic default armor. It is most commonly seen by n00bs trying to get everyone to believe they are the master chief.

CQB: Stands for Close Quarter Bananas. It features a shiv on the front of the chest piece, this is only used for peeling bananas at close quarters.

EVA This is a super evolved space suit that protects the wearer from space...stuff. The EVA doesn't stand for anything, it is actually part of a sentence: "omg lyk best friends 4EVA" The UNSC stole the armor from the Ranger Elites. It is also badass cuz' the meta wears it.

Security This armor is unlocked when you get a certain amount of Achievements. Most people only wear this armor to say "hey i has security lololol." When they didn't actually earn it and the visor looks like a f*cking bubble.

Mark V The most awesomest and badass armor on the game. Not many people wear it though because they think it sucks. They are wrong though because this is the only armor that lets you squish popcorn.

ODST Even less people want to wear this armor because of were it came from. This is because everyone hates ODST's because they think they are better than you (even though they are n00bs).

Rogue All teenage spartans that are having a rebellion wear this helmet. It doesn't look that good. They only wear it because it's designer.

Scout This armor is awful because it makes you look like a fucking duck.

EOD This armor makes you look kinda ugly. It sunglasses though, the UNSC put this feature in to make you feel better about wearing it and because you can't go wrong in shades there is also giant muffins for the shoulders which the testicle chins love to eat with cereal in a bowl EVA helmet for breakfast .

Recon The most exclusive armor that a player could wish for. The downside is that if you wear it you get 50 friends requests per game. The good thing is, that if an n00b says "can i has reconz?" 3 bungie ninjas come out of no-where and will snap their neck.

Hayabusa The ultimate n00b armor. The best thing to come out of this armor is the shoulders and maybe that awesome sword on the back of it. The helmet makes you look like someone out of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.

  • Note that these armors are for the multiplayer, not campaign so don't ask, "where is ma hayabusa?"

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