Jackal

From Gruntipedia

This article is too damned short, Marine! You will help Gruntipedia by making it larger so it will fit the screen, fool!

For those born without a sense of humour, Halopedia has an article on Jackal.

*Something incomprehensible*

— A Jackal on how the Covenant treat him and the rest of his species.

Woah! we do look like f**king turkeys!

— A Jackal upon discovering an amazing human device, the mirror.

Dude...have you noticed that we rule at long-range fire but we suck like hell when it comes to close-range weapons?

— One Jackal to another Jackal.

Holt shit!! Check out my skillz with this plasma pistol!

— a Jackhole after shooting his Brute commander.

Jackholes, colloqually known as Jackals or F***ing ugly Jackasses, are exactly what their name says; Jack All. They are a skinny race of weird yellow space-chickens. They don't seem to eat much of what the Covenant call "food", and so they remain anorexic because they didn't bring their own preferred foods (Or lunchboxes). They use sniper rifles because they are cowards, but use other guns that they can never hit anything with. Jackals have large blue discs strapped to their arms, which they use as protective shields. However, this is not their primary function. The discs are actually miniature communications dishes that are used to exercise mind-control on Grunts. The rays emitted by the discs stop the Gruntiness affecting the Grunts, and thus stops them from rebelling. Like the other Covenant species the Jackals have to take a dip in the Butter couldron before battle so sticky grenades won't stick to them. Jackals originate for the planet Eayn, commonly referred to as the jackhole of the galaxy. Jackals were accepted into the covenant because the Profit of Truth lost a bet. Apparently, Truth cannot hold his liquor. Jackholes evolved from a subspecies of turkey that decided that they needed a better purpose in life.

Known Jackals:

• Charlie Dickson
• Superman
• Soulja boy
• Anoobis(lord of the n00bs)
• Yayap, honorary Jackal

There were never any famous jackals since nobody wanted to pay attention to an under-fed turkey with jaundice. The most effective weapons against them are rocks, scizzors, a Turkey baster, or Thanksgiving Day.

Proper way to hunt and dispose of turkeys. Note how he is in extreme pain, begging to be eaten for Thanksgiving.

Turkeys have also been known to pull off Matrix moves

If provoked, turkeys may release energy attacks, which are also mastered by Spartans