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Assault Cannon

IMMA FIRIN MAH ASSAULT CANNON! (overused joke is overused)

Cquote1I think Assault Cannon is a pretty cool guy, eh sh00ts huge boogres and doesn't afraid of anythingCquote2
— Anonymous 4Chan user

Brief DescriptionEdit

The Type-1337 Directed Green Goo Blaster Thingy (also known as Assault Cannon) is the cybernetic arm of the Mega Legos that shoots green Jello at Whores and it is also the Hunter's primary weapon, while the secondary being the huge shield thing that they use to crush Grunts with for fun in their spare time. The assault cannon can kill you in one hit but is easy to dodge, well it wasn't before Halo 3: ODST because they didn't shoot bombs, they shot continuous green beams similiar to the Quadlazer. Either way the shit is pretty powerful, but you cant wield it unfortunately, that really sucks because it seems like a perfect weapon to pwn things with...

CombatEdit

The Assault Cannon's ammo is composed of pure gross stuff from the 7th layer of Hell. It's ammo includes Boogers, Snot, Jello, Puke, Goo, and Drone feces. It is not meant to hurt the target, as it is to gross them out. The Assault Cannon shoots all this nasty shit at the opponent, the opponent, when covered in all of this, will yell, "EWWW EWWY EWWWY EWWW!!! GET IT OFF! OH MY GOD I FEEL IT MOVINGQ" and die from a heart attack of being a huge pussy.

TriviaEdit

  • You can't use it
  • The other weapon a Hunter uses is a big shield to crush you and block your shots with
Weapons
UNSC
Melee Weapons: Kitchen Knife | Japanese Butter Knife | Taser Stick

Handguns: Comfortable Pistol | Another Comfortable Pistol | WTF no scope? | M6C/Suck em' | God's Sidearm | Safety Mode On | Trusty Sidearm | Trusty Sidearm 2: Gradius | Assassination Pistol | Carbine Pistol | Silenced Pistol | Orbital Airstrike

Automatic & Semi-Automatic Weapons: Bullet Hose | Silent Bullet Spitter | Insult to Rifles | Revised Insult to Rifles | Chronologically Confusing insult to rifles | The insult to rifles that actually kicks ass | Bee-Arr | Bullet Spammer | Another insult to rifles | Large Bullet Hose

Other: HEADSHOT! | Pest Control Tool | Mini Missile Silo | Rocket Lawn chair | Splazer | Campergun | Noob Obliterator | Crude Thumper rip-off | Supersonic Rail Exploder | Exploding Cake Detonator | Kill The Hydra

Grenades: Damn, no stickies | Bang Grenade | Ear Bleeder | "I embrace y'all with napalm..."

Covenant
Melee Weapons: Energy Shank | Hot Poker | Death Stick | Energy Shiv | Gravy Hammer | Monkey Fist | Monkey Shank

Other: Peashooter | Overheated | Angry Plasma Rifle | Overheater | Noobler | Larger Noobler | Long range Noobler | Nailgun | New Noob Combo | Rock Slinger | L337 5K1LL5 | Follow the pink light | Vacuum Quadlazer | Jelly Launcher | Semtex Blue Spider | Stick-rock | Fire in the Box

Heavy Weapons: Mini Blue Jelly Factory | Death impersonated | Godly Plasma Rifle | Huge Water Gun on Spaceships | Hax Gun | Smaller Hax Gun | Derp Gun | Magic Grenade Thrower

Forerunner
The Quadlazer | Zapper | Tracer Rifle | Yellow Light Spammer | Campergun's Retarded Brother | Triforce Gun | Promethean Glory | Forcefield | Bee Grenade

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